Delivery story 12 Tom Splatters writes: I worked for a pizza place in the Vancouver area of British Columbia Canada and we had an extremely large delivery area like many places do. I was on a routine delivery out to the delivery boundary, one that we extended recently to offer delivery to an area that had no other stores beside it. It was about 5 o'clock and I first dropped off a closer one (we were always given doubles to ease the pain of long deliveries) and then proceeded down the highway to a house with a 60-foot driveway. I saw a note on the ticket that said "Around Back" so I proceeded to venture around the back of the house to seek the door of the lower suite. As I was walking back, I heard the sound all delivery drivers dread, "Woof" "Bark" "Growl" and almost instantly was surrounded by three mean looking barking dogs. I've done this for a while, so I yelled at them to get away. They didn't, of course, but didn't try to bite me either. So here I am surrounded by three decent sized dogs, invading somebody's back yard. I saw a door at the back, one with a door bell, so I went and knocked on the door. (Always knock first, ring second -- better tips this way.) After knocking a few times, I decided to ring the bell. The bell was rung three or four times and still no response, not even a sound from inside. By now the dogs are getting angry at the man who smells like yummy pizza and have started to aggressively bark and growl at me, so I decided to go back around to the front and shut the gate behind me. I then went to the front door, knocked a few times, and then rang the doorbell. I got an answer, an older chunky lady who was holding a little yappy dog who was yelping at me in her arms. To my dismay, she put the little bugger down, who was jumping at me and barking while I was trying to give this lady her pizza. By now a total of ten minutes had lapsed while I was at this house trying to get things going. A grand total of 40 minutes on the road since I was last at the store. Just as I thought that this delivery couldn't get any worse, as the lady went to find her purse, the little crap of a dog took off down the field next to the house. Instead of paying for the pizza, the lady went outside and started yelling at the dog to come inside. The dog, being obedient as dogs always are, continued trotting off, while the lady stood there, belting out the dog's name which was something like "Roger" or some human name. She stood there trying to get the dog to come in for ten minutes. Realizing that I was already screwed, I decided to let this one play out and I would be the observer. The woman eventually went waddling after the dog, which took another five or six minutes, and came back to pay me finally, for a pizza that had to be cold by now. She paid me and off I went to explain why I had been gone for and hour and fifteen minutes for deliveries that should have taken 40 minutes tops. Here are the main problems with this situation: 1. After all of that I got a $1.26 tip total for the two deliveries (the first was a replacement.) 2. I never received a thank-you, and I'm sorry for holding you up, or any recognition of my inconvenience at all. 3. The lady was actually kind of rude to me the whole time, blaiming me for going around back and then letting her dog get away. 4. I missed about 4 possible deliveries during this time. Sweet Revenge: 1. Her little dog got out again after she paid me and took off down the field again. 2. My car had a radiator leak and had leaked rad fluid all over her driveway because it took so long to deliver. 3. We no longer deliver out there because of this situation. My manager didn't really care about the whole story, but did use the time it took as a excuse to cut our delivery area down to a more reasonable size in that direction. This stupid lady caused everybody in the area to lose delivery opportunity. Some other small notes on delivery: One driver honestly said to me, "I've seen two naked women in the five years that I've delivered, one was five, and the other was eighty-five." Thank you to the 20 something women who orders her food to arrive exactly at the time when she steps out of the shower, tips well, and wears a very revealing bath robe. I will not go pick up cigarettes, beer, or anything from Mac's for you, unless you really make it worth my while, and if anybody asks I still didn't do it. When two houses are beside each other, and there is no indication of the address on either one, and the surrounding houses are too far away to help with identification, Murphy's Law says that you will always knock on the wrong door, and the people there will get mad. Don't sneak through people's security gates, they don't appreciate this, and get confused as to how you did it. If there are dogs loose, they will jump up and scratch your car. Carry lots of pennies for those exact change people, count slowly. If given two orders to deliver, always deliver to the well known tipper first, no matter who's is supposed to arrive first. Good tippers or even consistent tippers get better service. Don't speed excessively, tickets cost more than lost deliveries, and so do accidents, especailly if not insured properly. Don't deliver in your dad's company car, this will get both you and your dad in trouble, and you fired for sure. Dress nicely, i.e. dress shirt not ripped shirt, and decent looking pants and shoes. Tips are better in this situation, especially if you are nice. Loud boom box in car is a no-no. Drunk people and high people tip well, but don't piss the drunk ones off. When people offer you pot, say yes only if you think it will improve your cash tip, when boss inquires about smell, say it is from the customer's and not you. Side roads are faster than main roads. return to top